22 2012 Tini - Pencil: Jim and Ariel

I just love the tenderness in this picture-the flow of her hair and the look in her eyes. It is indeed very dreamy, especially with all the white space you left.

At the same time it is this white space that makes things worse for this drawing. The grey-yellowish tint surrounding the character seems too much of a contrast on the bright white background. A pure white background would work fine. Even if I think pencil pictures should generally be grayscaled to eliminate the yellowish tint (unless a desired effect) and make them easier for clean up, I still think that an evenly yellowish tint for the whole picture would have been better than a yellow on white background.
The way the bodies are cropped on the left side seem to enhance this feeling of the drawing being pasted on top of a white background and hugely distracting from the main point.
Adding to this is the huge dA watermark which, considering how tiny the image is, makes it almost impossible to see the details.
A range of computer software can be used to create your own watermark in a more unobtrusive way.
I think the way to go here is either
-crop the drawing entirely with no background for a greater impact or
-move the drawing down a bit to avoid centring, convert the picture to Grayscale and clean up excessive tones to make it seamlessly merge with the background. leaving more background can be a bit distracting but can add to a dreamier feeling if composition is handled with care.
-create a smaller watermark

Most of my notes concern the editing as you see. The drawing itself is nice with a decent composition, nice contrast and a tender atmosphere. Drawing more than one person in a picture is always hard to deal with, especially interacting bodies -hugging, kissing etc. so a good job with that <img src="e.deviantart.net/emoticons/t/t…" width="15" height="15" alt="" title="Thumbs Up"/>